Since beginning my blog almost 6 months ago, I have been a tornado in the kitchen at least 5 days out of the week.
I cooked and baked a lot before the blog, but I love the challenge that the blog has put upon me in creating new meals for myself, my family, and friends. I get bored so easily when it comes to food - always wanting something different – so developing a new recipe is like finding gold to me.
Or like finding a new pair (or 7) of Christian Louboutain’s in my closet.
For the past 10 days, I have not cooked ONE thing. Well, I did make some sub-par macaroni and cheese last Friday – only so those of us that hate veggies and are not eating meat on Friday’s due to Lent would not starve. 
Before my grandma passed, I was having major ‘blogger’s block.’ After she passed, I really had no desire to blog at all. I have been having serious doubts about my writing - if it is any good at all - and if I will ever get anywhere with it. After all, I blog to write, not to cook. In usual fashion, when things get difficult, I want to quit.
I had a ginormous baking disaster in the kitchen last night – one that had me standing in the kitchen for almost 3 hours and left me with nothing to show for it. If only I could decorate cookies like my beautiful friend, Amanda, last night would have been a success!
Maybe I should just hire her to come bake for me.
The disaster left me with nothing to post today. I usually bake or cook multiple recipes at a time, giving some away to friends or family, or making them for a party at our home. I used most of extra post’s up this week due to the unfortunate events.
But, I did find these muffins tucked away in my iPhoto gallery.
Remember the whole wheat peanut butter and jelly muffins? I adapted the recipe a bit to make healthier chocolate peanut butter muffins.
And boy, were they delicious!
I knew that just this plain ole’ muffin wasn’t going to do, since I always need a bit of drama in my life.
So I doused it with melted peanut butter.
Whole Wheat Peanut Butter Fudge Muffins
Makes ~12 muffins
1 3/4 cups whole wheat pastry flour
1/3 cup sugar
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup cocoa powder
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 1/4 cups milk
1/2 cup creamy peanut butter (I used Naturally More)
1/4 cup egg whites
3 tablespoons butter, melted
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2-3 tablespoons applesauce
1/2 cup chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 400.
Lightly spoon flours into dry measuring cups; level with a knife. Combine flours, sugars, cocoa powder, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl; stir with a whisk. Make a well in center of mixture. Combine milk and next 4 ingredients (through vanilla); add to flour mixture, stirring just until moist. Stir in applesauce. Fold in chocolate chips.
Spoon batter into 12 muffin cups coated with cooking spray. Fill each cup 3/4 full with batter. Bake at 400° for 20 minutes or until muffins spring back when touched lightly in center. Let cool in pan 5 minutes. Remove from pan, and cool on a wire rack.
Top with melted peanut butter.
Chocolate and peanut butter make the world go ’round. Don’t you agree?
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Sometimes the pressure to blog and finding the “right” recipe to write about can be overwhelming. I think that we just need to say to ourselves, “it’s okay” to take a break. The blog world will still be there when we come back. I know I have spent many hours thinking about what’s coming next, what’s going to happen, if it will be okay, will people like it, but ya know what, what does it really matter? If you need a break, we will all REALLY REALLY miss you, but it’s okay, take one! You will find inspiration again. And about your writing style, there is NO DOUBT you are so talented. Self-doubt is a killer, but I promise you, you will always have readers! and I guess I’ll mention I want one of these muffins right now. They would go perfect with my coffee and remote right now.
I do hope you’ll continue blogging – I look forward to each and every one of your beautiful, witty and delicious looking posts.
And I 100% agree that chocolate and peanut butter do, in fact, make the world go ’round!
your muffins look delicious. and I hear you on the blogger’s block. And you post more often than I do! I only post twice a week. I would love to be able to post more often, but I just don’t have the time/money to cook like that
I’ve noticed that blogging has made my grocery bill go up for sure. it’s worth it though. so yeah, this comment is more like a bunch of random thougths about blogging. but i understand where you’re coming from. i like to have pictures/recipes in reserve as well, and it stresses me out when I don’t!
Aw girl, you are an awesome blogger!! your recipes always sound to die for and I love love the way you write.
i sometimes get bloggers block too, or if I have nothing fun or a new product or recipe I think to myself…will anyone just like looking at my food that I ate today? I always try to be creative but sometimes, I just am boring lol..you always come up with the most fabulous recipes and this looks amazing! I love that you healthified it too…then doused in PB
this looks awesome! and naturally more is the best PB. EVER!!!
Good Lord this is beautiful! I am drooling. Such beautiful and decadent little healthy treats! Thanks for the recipe. And I love your blog, please don’t stop writing.
I think everyone suffers from writer’s block. I’ve found that waiting it out is the best thing to do and then *boom* I’ll be inspired. Your blog is fabulous girly!
Here’s my little…push…to keep blogging. We enjoy your posts so much! But, take a break when needed. All us bloggers need it. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night thinking of what I need to blog the next day, so I know how you feel:)
I don’t comment all the time because usually I have no idea what to say except “oh my godddd I want that NOW!” and I don’t want to write the same comment everyday. But I do enjoy your posts and amazing recipes everyday! You’re posts are always funny and a good reminder to enjoy the finer food indulgences of life. Like everyone else, I hope you continue!
You are amazing. Of course you are gonna have days where you feel like giving up, we all do. As we get older we take on many more challenges.. being a wife, working (blah), maintaining a house, being with family etc… Those things make us who we are as a person. And Im sure those experiences will help you along in your blog/writing. Keep plugging away. Btw…I was watching food network and your new challenge is a dessert pizza using your whole wheat homemade crust.. K? Then deliver it to… you know where
I do need some sweets!!
That’s an interesting idea! And don’t worry about the blogger’s block, or the frustrations.. I believe we all go through phases of self-loathing over the things we are passionate about. I love reading your blog!
Hey honey…maybe you need a break! I love your blog but if it is something you need to step away from then you should. Maybe take like a 2 week break and just re-evaulate what you want out of life. We will all still be here if you decide to come back and if not then we will all wish you the best! You are a very special person, Jess, and you ARE a good writer. But sometimes the best thing you can do is take time away FOR you. I am sorry you are going through a rough time…hang in there!
That last picture put me over the edge!!! YUUUMMMMMMMM!
This blog has to be first and foremost for you and I don’t believe in forcing the blog posts. Sometimes, we just aren’t into it. It happens and it is OK. Take a break if you need to, we will be here when you come back.
Don’t doubt yourself! I know it’s easy to do so but you have a whole community of bloggers that LOVE your blog (including me – I look forward to your stories and delicious recipes every week). I definitely empathize with the desire to just throw in the towel, but I think you might regret it if you did. AND it’s certainly understandable to take a “blog break” every once in a while – especially after something like what you’ve been going through.
ahhhh kitchen disaster…so frustrating! All that work! Well these muffins look delicious. The melty nut butter on top=major drool-age. Hope you have a good weekend!!
Totally agree…peanut butter and chocolate DO make the world go round.
Sometimes I find myself forcing to make something just because I think it will be more “blog friendly” than the peanut butter and honey sandwich that I REALLY want. I think it’s important to remember that we do this for FUN! That being said, I love all of your treats and I think I’m going to have to make these amazing looking muffins!
i know what you mean about when things get tough just wanting to quit. i haven’t read any of your book (obvi) but your writing on this blog touches my life every day! i look forward to your funny tidbits and complete hilarious honesty about yourself and Mr How Sweet. I love the moving posts where you talk about your sweet grandmothers and how writing makes you feel.
you’re doing a great job and you’re a huge inspiration! keep up the great work jess
This is my first visit to your blog. I am going to make the chocolate chip cookie pie for dessert tonight. I am sorry about your grandma. Maybe, a little time for you without any pressure will be good. If the blog is something you enjoy, then persevere.
Peanut butter and chocolate are definitely tops.
I am bound and determined to find a vegetable recipe that you’ll ooh and ah h over!
Oh, there definitely are some – they are usually just drowned in butter, breadcrumbs and cheese. Not ideal for everyday eating.
Honestly I LOVE your writing, I am a vegan and can’t eat most of your foods (and I am not much of a cook anyway) but I come back everyday for your amazing writing! /you are good girl!
I love your writing and your creative mix of fitness and fabfoods.
for me it was only when I decided NOT to blog 5 days a week that I finally WANTED to blog 5 days a week again.
carla
Jessica, like the other readers, I don’t come back for the bacon or butter. I come back because you are a sweet girl with a crazy funny whit and a beautiful writing style that puts a smile on my face. I hope you stick around, but of course it’s so personal, so do what you need to do!
Take care girl! XOXO
Hi there…I’m sorry to hear about your grandma. I’m glad you have gotten back into bloggin because i really enjoy your writing and the pictures! I stumbled across your blog today and I think it is lovely! I am really tempted to make these muffins…they look delicious!! Oh and btw, I think it is amazing that you can create stuff in the kitchen 5 out of 7 days a week!! I can’t wait to read more of your recipes.
Take Care!
It seems like I have to be in the right mindset to crank out a worthy post. So I can understand what you mean there. It’s hard to forge your amazing humor, witt, and sarcasm when you’re mind and heart is elsewhere.
Glad you’re back…and these muffins look bomb!
The PB on top makes this muffin, totally yummy looking. This is a nice creation.
Yep, PB and chocolate are pretty much life’s essentials to happiness
Those muffins look great!
And you’ll get your writing mojo back, you are a fantastic writer and it’s okay to take a mental break if you need one girl! I’ll be here to keep reading whatever wonderfulness you post, believe that!
Hey there!
Oh no! Please don’t stop blogging! I just discovered your blog…and I’m addicted! I too have gone through blogging slumps..who am I kidding! I’m there right now but I’ve been here before and eventually the slump gets better.
I am so sorry to read of your Grandma’s passing. I am so glad that you have wonderful memories of her! You will cherish those memories for a lifetime I’m sure! Just know that you have a WHOLE BUNCH OF readers who are rallying around you right now with support!
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!
Lindsay
http://www.passengerseatkindofgirl.com
Chocolate & PB go hand in hand like peas & carrots.
I just wanted to let you know that we all get frustrated with ourselves from time to time and I’ve had my fair share of “I’m no good at anything I do” times. I love your writing, I think it is so funny and witty. Keep up the writing or whose blog will I go to for things like PB & Chocolate muffins??? All of the bacon lovers will be seriously sad as well if your blog was not around!!
those last words have never been more true!
aww, jess thank you for your sweet comment. im so thankful for loving people like you girl
Holy delicious! I’m going to need to upsize my jeans with all of your yummy recipes!
Okay so the title had me drooling –these look OUTRAGEOUSLY DELICIOUS!!!
With love and cupcakes,
Cookteen
Wow these look so decadent. Don’t worry about bloggie-block, I think we’ve all had our fair share of kitchen failures. You’ll be back in action very soon, I love you, your blog, and your creativity.
Just so you know – your writing is AWESOME!!!! I read every single word of your blog, and I always laugh and smile. I even read excerpts to my husband
I love it!
And those muffins are sinful. Darn you.
I’m just going to say that I LOVE your blog. You almost always manage to bring a grin to my face, and you upload the most DELICIOUS things…
like these MUFFINS, for example.
HOOOOLYYYYYY-COW.
WHY did I have to settle for baking plain ol’ OATMEAL muffins last night? Why didn’t I sense something better…more DELICIOUS was on it’s way?
I adored your PB&J muffins, and these just sound AWESOME. I will make them as soon as I can. I’d probably go with the 3 T of applesauce and a extra sprinkle of sugar…as I found the pb&j muffins were lacking..something. I wonder what honey/maple syrup would taste like in these?
YUM
Hi! While I’m a relatively new reader I am already hooked on seeing what yummy creations you bake up. And by reading the comments, there are alot of readers who also love what you are doing. Self doubt is something I imagine we all struggle with (food blogger or not). At the end of the day, write for yourself and everything will fall into place. And if you need to a break, take one. We’ll still be here to cheer you on.
They make my world go round. YUM!
Have a great weekend, Jess!
The PB melting on top is such a lovely touch!! These look great!!
Btw, I still can’t stop thinking of yesterday’s cookie pie… 
That picture of the peanut butter cascading over the chocolate muffin is indeed dramatic and beautiful…and could make the world go ’round.
I think you are a fantastic writer, and I would REALLY miss you if you ever gave up this blogging thing. I think we all get stuck sometimes…especially when there are more important things going on in our lives. Hang in there and know that you are so loved in the blog world.
If you quit writing, I will drive to your house and dump melted peanut butter all over your sassy head. Then I will smash six muffins in your face and eat the other half dozen. Think about that one before you make any drastic decisions.
I love reading your blog and I think your energy is great! A true inspiration. I cannot believe you only launched it 6 months ago. Your recipes and writing are so fun to read and I learn loads. These muffins look oh so yummy with the peanut butter sauce. These & my Chocolate cookies would make a mighty fine plate of yumminess!
Thank you for saying, Jessica, that you too find yourself making food just to blog about it…and that sometimes after 3 hrs in the kitch, you have very little or nothing to show for it. I feel similarly; although I never totally just make things to make them, I admit, sometimes I make yet another dessert b/c it will be very blog-worthy. And I dont want it or want to make it, but I do. Thank god for a husband and child otherwise my neighbor’s would love me b/c i truly cant eat all i make…no way.
Thank you for this honesty.
and your writing, as i wrote to you before, I think you’re wonderful and if you want to chat more, dump, vent, or bounce anything off me…I am always here
HOLY MOLY!
*-*
I think I´m in love.
Hahahahaha
You´re so talented!
Have a great weekend
Brazilian XOXO´s,
Gabriela
I am new to your blog. I must say that your blog (and you!) are gorgeous. Love the pink.
I admire anyone who can bake. In some ways it is so much more challenging than cooking. These muffins look beautiful!
- Christina
hello gorgeous. just caught up with several of your posts~ you’re perfect
Looks heavenly… too bad I can’t handle peanut butter.
I am so impressed with your kitchen abilities. I need to gain some courage to just “go for it” in the kitchen, because I believe that some level of fearlessness is required in order to be a good cook.
And yes, PB and chocolate do make the world go ’round
Those muffins make the world go round! Oh my……chocolate and peanut butter are two of my favorite things. You never cease to amaze me.
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