Ignore these.

And this.

And obviously these. [hence the dust]

But especially this.

Oh, and don’t forget about this.

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56 Responses to “How To Stay In Love With Your Husband.”

  1. #
    1
    Kristina @ spabettie — January 26, 2011 @ 8:03 pm

    I KNEW it was going to be that turkey!! :D

    Reply

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    Liz @ Tip Top Shape — January 26, 2011 @ 9:32 pm

    hahaha, ignorance is bliss I guess??

    Reply

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    Nicole — January 26, 2011 @ 9:44 pm

    This is why you give them their own room or a man cave!! And then pile all their stuff in that room and shut the door. Problem solved. At least until I venture into the man cave for a pre-hosting-a-party cleanliness inspection and start freaking out over the Lord of the Rings figurines, South Park stuffed characters, NY Giants/NJ Devils stuff (must go before the Super Bowl), and other assorted ‘precious’ belongings! But that turkey – seriously creepy. It needs to have an unfortunate accident.

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 26th, 2011 @ 9:46 pm

      This stuff is all in “his” room. I ventured in for a photo shoot.

      Reply

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    Mary (A Merry Life) — January 26, 2011 @ 9:44 pm

    Hilarious.

    Reply

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    Layla — January 26, 2011 @ 9:44 pm

    Oh heavens, is that Chris Benoit? I do believe our husbands would be incredible friends that watch embarrassing shows together.

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 26th, 2011 @ 9:45 pm

      IT IS!

      Reply

      • Layla — January 26th, 2011 @ 9:53 pm

        I can’t even believe I know that. My husband would be so proud!!

        • Jessica — January 26th, 2011 @ 9:55 pm

          My husband is going to want to steal you away.

  6. #
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    Callie — January 26, 2011 @ 9:45 pm

    Hahahaha. Too funny. Lucky for me, all those types of items still reside at my mother-in-law’s house. I hope I never inherit them.

    Reply

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    Sana — January 26, 2011 @ 9:47 pm

    bahahahahah! yes yesyesss!

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 26th, 2011 @ 9:50 pm

      Sana! The correct response is “no no no!”

      Reply

  8. #
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    Erika @ FoodFitnessFun — January 26, 2011 @ 9:49 pm

    Hahaha! I’m such a clean freak – I’d probably throw all that stuff out. I LOL’ed when I saw that turkey! Too funny! :-D

    Reply

  9. #
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    Samantha @ Health, Happiness & Skinny Jeans — January 26, 2011 @ 9:49 pm

    Hilarious!!

    Reply

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    Kristine — January 26, 2011 @ 9:52 pm

    I have NASCAR cars decorating my house. My husband picked out about 10 of them to display out of 4 totes (at least) of them. And sadly because we live in a small 2 bedroom we don’t have an extra room to hide them. They are “proudly” displayed in our hallway and even some in our living room tucked in the corner.

    Reply

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    megan — January 26, 2011 @ 10:00 pm

    Oh man. Lucky you :)

    I obviously don’t know either of you, but in the obvious ways you point out on your blog, you and your husband seem so different. I mean, tiffanys and nascar? WWE and manolos?

    Reply

  12. #
    12
    Eliz@The Sweet Life — January 26, 2011 @ 10:17 pm

    Differences make the heart grow fonder? Maybe? Ha–I have my same list. It makes for interesting discussion, to say the least. And really–who wants a husband who loves shoes and makeup and pink things? :)

    Reply

  13. #
    13
    Rach — January 26, 2011 @ 10:28 pm

    Hahaha! Great marriage advice! :)

    Reply

  14. #
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    Cheryl Stoy — January 26, 2011 @ 10:32 pm

    All my husband’s “artifacts” as I choose to refer to them are in a separate room which I only venture into (with my eyes closed) if i haven’t seen him for few hours. And I only do that to make sure he’s still breathing and hasn’t had a barbell fall on him. The room is full of fitness equipment, fitness trophies he won while he was competing, yoga and zen books and mats and every known Chicago Bears and Boston Red Sox retail item that can be legally purchased that I have gotten for him over the years. There are also Lord of the Rings action figures and gym clothes that haven’t been washed since the last kid left home…and that was 3 years ago. At least I haven’t seen a stuffed turkey but you never know…

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 27th, 2011 @ 3:45 am

      I’m pretty sure you have me beat. But give me a few more years of marriage.

      Reply

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    Heather — January 26, 2011 @ 10:40 pm

    Haha! Oh my gosh! Boys and their toys!

    Reply

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    Lauren at KeepItSweet — January 26, 2011 @ 10:46 pm

    LOL That is how I feel about the multiple guitars and golf clubs that are stored in our tiny apartment

    Reply

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    Jenn L @ Peas & Crayons — January 26, 2011 @ 11:24 pm

    poor thing…

    Reply

  18. #
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    Gen — January 26, 2011 @ 11:55 pm

    Hahahahahah
    poor you! Want me to send you some caramel virtually? It helps!

    Reply

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    Amber Starr — January 27, 2011 @ 12:04 am

    Thanks for a good laugh! Sadly, I completely relate! I have at least been lucky enough to get him to move most of it out of the garage, however, I think it will be there forever at this rate…

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 27th, 2011 @ 3:44 am

      Oh man… I didn’t even start on the garage. That’s where most of his stuff is!

      Reply

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    Leah @ Why Deprive? — January 27, 2011 @ 12:20 am

    hahaha men and their tastes eh? My boyfriend has a giant, wall sized map in his bedroom and has marked all the places he’s been with a sharpie. If he didnt still live with his mom, it would be in his living room.

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 27th, 2011 @ 3:44 am

      You may hate me… but I actually think that sounds kind of cool!

      Reply

      • Leah @ Why Deprive? — January 27th, 2011 @ 3:52 am

        NOOO!!!! Why does everyone always say that? lol he doesnt need your help!

        • Jessica — January 27th, 2011 @ 3:54 am

          Trust me, I do understand THAT. You will never hear me say it again. ;)

  21. #
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    Eates-A-Lot — January 27, 2011 @ 12:26 am

    Not sure if you are into shirt woot. but saw this and thought it was appropriate.

    http://shirt.woot.com/

    Also –
    Just be glad Mr. Sweet doesn’t have a mullet…

    Reply

  22. #
    22
    Jena — January 27, 2011 @ 12:28 am

    When a friend of mine was engaged and setting up her new home with her fiance, I had to mediate the “no, the Transformers collection will NOT be displayed on the top of the kitchen cabinets” dispute. He could NOT for the life of him figure out why his beer glasses were an acceptable kitchen-displayed collection but not Transformers.

    Reply

  23. #
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    Jessi @ Quirky Cookery — January 27, 2011 @ 12:39 am

    Lol, great advice!

    And I, uh, still have my Mello Yello car, too…

    Reply

  24. #
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    Roxanne — January 27, 2011 @ 12:54 am

    and I thought the dozens of video games laying around my living room were bad. I think you’ve got me beat.

    Reply

  25. #
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    Sues — January 27, 2011 @ 1:12 am

    I’m pretty sure you have the secret to a perfect marriage! But that turkey has GOT to go!!

    Reply

  26. #
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    Dana — January 27, 2011 @ 2:00 am

    Hahaha I certainly have my fair share of stuff to ignore around the apartment, but that Turkey takes the cake!

    Reply

  27. #
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    Mary @ Bites and Bliss — January 27, 2011 @ 2:04 am

    hahaha! :D Good points.

    Reply

  28. #
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    Jess — January 27, 2011 @ 2:05 am

    we all have our crosses to bear….mine is that my husband has too many guitars and cords everywhere. we’re the best wives right?
    :)

    Reply

  29. #
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    chelsey @ clean eating chelsey — January 27, 2011 @ 3:04 am

    BAHAHAHAHAHA

    Reply

  30. #
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    mary (what's cookin' with mary) — January 27, 2011 @ 3:11 am

    LOL !!

    Reply

  31. #
    31
    mags — January 27, 2011 @ 3:25 am

    I just laughed myself SICK over the signed wrestling photo….LMAOOOOOO!

    Reply

  32. #
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    Lisa — January 27, 2011 @ 11:22 am

    I love him too, because he’s a Pittsburgh fan. GO STEELERS!!!!

    Reply

  33. #
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    Kathleen @ Kat's Health Corner — January 27, 2011 @ 11:26 am

    Hehe, lovely. :)

    Reply

  34. #
    34
    Becky — January 27, 2011 @ 1:55 pm

    He should be happy he has such a wonderful wife who let’s him proudly display an autographed picture of the “Canadian Crippler” Chris Benoit! I almost spit out my soda when I saw that. I wish I could remember for you how we rid our house of wrestling related activities. My husband still asks if he can bring all of his ’80’s WWF action figures home from his mom and dad’s house. Um, no!

    Reply

  35. #
    35
    Crystal — January 27, 2011 @ 2:38 pm

    He needs to get rid of that Chris Benoit picture! He may have been a great wrestler, but in the end he was a horrible person :(

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 27th, 2011 @ 3:18 pm

      He’s well aware of that!

      Reply

  36. #
    36
    Ashley — January 27, 2011 @ 3:39 pm

    A man cave helps for all that junk. And, someday, separate bathrooms! Haha. I’m not kidding– I want him to have a home office with a full bathroom so mine stays cleaner.

    Reply

  37. #
    37
    Angelica Garza — January 27, 2011 @ 7:20 pm

    I just stumbled across your blog, and I have to say, I laughed out loud at this post! So funny! Great blog :)

    Reply

    • Jessica — January 27th, 2011 @ 7:46 pm

      Thanks!

      Reply

  38. #
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    soul + food — January 29, 2011 @ 4:21 am

    ha ha! i love that last photo

    Reply

  39. #
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    Gracie — February 1, 2011 @ 2:18 am

    ohmygosh. I literally cannot stop laughing out loud right now.

    Reply

  40. #
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    Kat @ Living Like the Kings — February 1, 2011 @ 4:29 pm

    HA! Yes, that is indeed a good plan.

    Reply

  41. #
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    katie — February 18, 2011 @ 12:01 am

    lol oh my gosh you are too funny!

    Reply

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