That sounds fair right? I like to be fair.
So fair that I even took some pictures of broccoli. Oye. It was a complete snafu, I swear.
Clocking in as my least favorite vegetable (well, minus the eight or so that I flat out refuse to taste), these little green trees here are creeping me out more than my weirdo man crush on Alec Baldwin. I don’t know what it is about him that I find so sexy, but if he wanted to hand-feed me broccoli I wouldn’t hate it.
Wait… no… I don’t know.
What I do know is that this chicken made my house smell like 4000 cloves of cheesy garlic (in a delicious way) and my mouth was watering as I scooped it on top of some whole wheat orzo. And then I stared at it. But it just looked so… blah. So uncolorful. So vanilla, if you will. Which honestly… really just makes me want ice cream. Now.
It has been quite dark and dreary and gloomy around these parts the last few days and I’ve craved some color in my life. And something more than the sparkly pink nail polish I painted on only to peel off 34 minutes later and the rainbow sprinkles that dumped all over the kitchen floor TWICE this past weekend because I stuff everything and it’s mother inside my kitchen cabinets. That was fun! Not.
I threw open the fridge door in a frenzy because if the holiday season taught my blood sugar anything, it’s that I’m starving every 20 seconds. But there was um, nothing inside. I didn’t go to the grocery store for almost two weeks, unless I found myself screaming, “I’m out of butter AGAIN” or “how is it possible to eat 3 pounds of cheese in three days?” I didn’t cook ONE meal in nearly fourteen days (maybe longer?), unless you count two handfuls of cereal and three peanut butter blossoms a meal. Which coincidentally, I often did. But seriously… no meals. I don’t know how we pieced together dishes when we weren’t calling for pizza or mooching out of someone else’s kitchen. And it was wonderful.
But inside that crisper drawer? All I found was two week old beef stew (don’t ask), an extremely moldy red pepper half, a bag of slimy carrots that gratefully shared it’s slime with the rest of the drawer, and a half-dead pouch of Trader Joe’s broccoli that I bought with good intentions but no plans. Like usual.
I quickly steamed it, which by the way… made my house smell like utter garbage. So then I threw it under the broiler with olive oil and cheese because the few times I’ve let it cross my lips is after it’s been charred to the holy heavens and back then graciously doused in sea salt. Yes. I know that OMG peoplelovebroccoliwhenroastedwithparmesan! Please don’t remind me. I’m well aware. If I liked vegetables my life would be so much easier. So I prayed this would make it more palatable and I sort of mashed it with a fork or something so it wasn’t so resembling of that one dude’s bean stalk. I was able to choke down a few of the really tiny pieces… after I would cover them in a bit more parmesan. But then I had to start picking it out and decided that 2012 would not be the year of the broccoli. I’m not sure I can ruin another super easy and delicious crockpot meal with such grossness.
Mr. How Sweet agreed, but still declared this his “favorite meal of 2012.” Then he asked why it doesn’t taste like cookies.
Crockpot Parmesan Chicken
4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
4 tablespoons olive oil
6 tablespoons dry white wine
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper
4 garlic cloves, minced
1 teaspoon dried basil
1/2 teaspoon dried parsley
1/4 cup finely grated parmesan cheese + 2 tablespoons
1 cup uncooked whole wheat orzo
3/4 cup vegetables of your choice
The night before, season chicken breasts with salt and pepper. Whisk together 3 tablespoons olive oil, cheese, basil, parsley, garlic and 3 tablespoons of wine in a bowl. Place chicken in a large ziplock bag, then pour marinade over top and coat chicken. Keep in the fridge overnight.
The next morning, place chicken in your crockpot with 3 tablespoons of wine. Cook on low for 6-8 hours.
Prepare whole wheat orzo according to directions. Once cooked, combine with remaining olive oil, parmesan and salt and pepper if desired. Cut chicken into pieces/chunks, and toss together with orzo. Add in vegetables of your choice! Top with additional parm.
This is a great meal to make ahead of time and store in the fridge for easy lunches and dinners.