I did I did!
First, I baked all day Friday. Then I didn’t clean up the kitchen at all, until 9PM rolled around and I whined that if I didn’t clean up the kitchen, I’d hate myself in the morning. So I did what any normal person does… lay on the couch and watch Fashion Police.
Saturday morning I woke up, hated myself for not cleaning the kitchen, and then… sat down on the couch.
Then I worked out with my husband. Ummm… a huge first. Granted we met in a gym (oh hi, cliche) and have worked out in close proximity to each other for years, but I am the type of person who wants to speak to no one while exercising – the type who puts my headphones on full blast and purposely ignores people even as they are flailing their arms in front of me.
Um what? I can’t hear you.
So yeah. We did that.
Then we did something else totally crazy… that included making breakfast, together. Like… cooking in the kitchen. AT THE SAME TIME. And not threatening divorce. This was huge.
He made eggs (they were okay) and I made pancakes (ehh… still okay) and then we ate. And then we decided after three plus years of being married that hey… we sort of actually like each other.
Then we started to fiiiiinally take down the Christmas decorations. And I tortured him to death because let me tell you this: my husband has a wild and crazy phobia of styrofoam. Yes, STYROFOAM! It makes him cringe, like nails on a chalkboard. I find it hilarious and love to squish it together anytime I can get my hands on it. I’ve often thought of wrapping one of his birthday presents in like 42 styrofoam boxes that progressively get smaller, and smaller, and…
I think he retracted his precious post-breakfast feelings after that.
So I got sucked into Rob Lowe’s memoir and read the entire thing in less than 24 hours. Then I google-imaged pictures of Rob Lowe for three more hours.* Then I wondered when it became unacceptable to hang posters of Rob Lowe on your (marital) bedroom ceiling.
Then I wondered why I don’t have a life.
In between all that, I ate pizza. Pizza is a super Saturday-y thing to do.
I didn’t do any laundry. Oh! But he did. My husband… not Rob Lowe. Until the washing machine broke mid-load. That was fun!
And while that was happening I was watching the Golden Globe red carpet hoopla, figuring that since most of the people on TV hadn’t eaten a brownie in like four months, that I’d eat an extra one for them. So I did. And I’ll tell you about those later. I also took a good fifteen minutes contemplating my thoughts on Gerard Butler’s hair. Then before I knew it Scott Disick was on the screen wearing some sort of violet blazer-type suit thing, which made me reconsider my favorite color and start re-reading Rob Lowe’s memoir.
Then Mr. How Sweet came downstairs and realized I still had not started researching washing machines, and umm… didn’t I know he is sincerely Type A and has to do a load of laundry (which consists of every color, fabric and item mashed together, not separated) every single day? And why couldn’t I just start acting like a grown up?
Then I reminded him of these red velvet cookies I had baked on Friday… totally thought up by someone brilliant on the Facebook page. I mean, I really didn’t think I could bust out a cookie this early in the year, with all the flour and sugar and pounds of butter looming heavily on my memory. I haven’t even craved a cookie since like, December 19th. But these made it past my mixer and just in time for you for Valentine’s Day… or you know, Tuesday. So he was happy.
And just then Rob Lowe came out to present a Golden Globe and was out there for an extra long time and I almost died. It’s totally fate.
Red Velvet Thumprints
[adapted from s'mores thumbprints]
makes about 20 cookies
1/2 cup unsalted butter, at room temperature
1/4 cup granulated sugar
2 tablespoons brown sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 egg yolk
1 cup all purpose flour
2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1 1/4 teaspoons red food coloring
1/2 cup mini chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Sift flour, cocoa powder and salt into a bowl and set aside.
In the bowl of an electric mixer, beat butter and sugars until fluffy (scraping the bowl when needed), for about 3-4 minutes. Add in egg yolk and vanilla, and beat for another 1-2 minutes until combined. Add in red food coloring (note: I used liquid coloring, if you use gel you may need more/less) and mix until color spreads. With the mixer on low speed, stir in the flour mixture and gradually increase the speed for the dough to come together, again scraping down the sides to combine. One batter has come together, fold in mini chocolate chips.
Roll into balls that are about 1 inch in diameter and set on a baking sheet 2 inches apart. Bake for 5 minutes, then remove from oven and gently press your thumb into the center of each cookie, creating a dent. Place the cookies back in the oven and bake for 5-6 more minutes. Remove and let cool completely.
Cream Cheese Marshmallow Frosting
4 ounces cream cheese, softened
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
3/4 cups marshmallow fluff
1 3/4 cups of powdered sugar
1-2 teaspoons milk, if needed
Beat cream cheese in the bowl of electric mixer until creamy. Add in fluff and beat for 2-3 minutes, then add in vanilla extract. With the mixer on low speed, add in powdered sugar 1 cup at a time until fully incorporated. Once all the sugar has been added, beat on medium-high speed for 2-3 minutes. If mixture if too runny, add a bit more sugar. If it’s too thick, add a bit of milk one teaspoon at a time. Frost cookies, then top with shaved chocolate if desired.
*Wait, that’s a lie. I’m not done.