What a name.

Chocolate Cream Slab Pie I howsweeteats.com

I don’t really want to consume something with the word “slab” in it, but I guess it’s a thing now. A thing for lots of people. This pie can feed your entire family. It’s your go-to Christmas dessert if you can’t stomach one more cookie. Or if you just want to get it all done, like NOW.

Don’t fear the slab. It’s just code for holy-cow-this-is-a-boatload-of-pie. Pie that can feed the stream of people that come to your house for the holidays. Yes. SO easy.

Hold on though. I have a major issue at the moment. My fridge is so stuffed with pie that I don’t know what to do with myself. You probably shouldn’t make a pie that feeds like twenty people if you live in a home of two people. My fridge is developing a muffin top. Spoiler alert: if you’re in my life, you’re getting pie this weekend. Act surprised!

Chocolate Cream Slab Pie I howsweeteats.com

The good news is I’ve had lots of pie for breakfast.

The bad news is I still have lots of pie for breakfast. halp me.

Chocolate Cream Slab Pie I howsweeteats.com

So here’s the deal. I’ll make it quick since it’s Friday: (probably not.)

I made mother lovett’s pie crust. You can make a real pie crust or buy one from the store (or probably two, since this is gigantic). You want to bake it first, and I don’t know jack about pies but I believe this is called blind baking. I basically had to open every bag of dried beans I had in my possession to weigh this sucker down.

I promise, it’s worth it. Swear.

However, you could also make a graham cracker crust. I die for graham crusts. I didn’t make one here because I wanted to be able to slice these in a pretty manner. Sometimes graham crusts can be finicky. If you want to make one, add a bunch of graham crumbs and melted butter together until it tastes good and seems to stick.

At least that’s what I do.

The filling is a homemade chocolate pudding with some fresh whipped cream folded in. It’s insanely heavenly. I could not stop eating it. UGH. Holidaze.

Chocolate Cream Slab Pie I howsweeteats.com

The topping is just more fresh whipped cream. And some chocolate shavings or sprinkles or whatever the heck you feel like doing. Oddly enough, this isn’t overly sweet. I think it’s the combination of the regular pie crust and the whipped cream that isn’t super sugar-laden. The chocolate center is rich, but the bottom and top layers even it out.

Do you know what they are like? PIE BROWNIES! Yes.

Let’s make THAT a thing. Pie brownies.

As long as you refrigerate it for the recommended amount of time, these slice up so nicely. You want to keep them in the fridge for as long as you can before serving due to the whipped cream, but once you slice – wowza. So pretty and fancy. Use a sharp knife. Make pretty squares. Serve them to friends. Get popular!

You win at life now.

Chocolate Cream Slab Pie I howsweeteats.com

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Chocolate Cream Slab Pie

Yield: serves at least 12+

Total Time: 6 hours (lots of down time)

Ingredients:

1 pie crust (I used that entire recipe, you can use a store-bought crust, graham crust, etc)
2 cups sugar
3 1/2 cups cold heavy cream
1 1/2 cups buttermilk
1/3 cup cornstarch
1 pinch salt
8 egg yolks
8 ounces high-quality chocolate, chopped
2 tablespoons butter
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1/4 cup powdered sugar
chocolate shavings or sprinkles for topping

Directions:

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees F. Roll your pie crust out onto an 18x13-inch baking sheet. I used a full batch of the pie crust above, which resulted in a slightly thicker crust. You could use half the batch and make a thinner crust. Place a piece of parchment paper over the pie dough and cover the top with pie weights or dried beans. Bake the crust for 20 to 30 minutes, or until it's just slightly golden and flakey. Remove from the over and let the crust cool completely.

Add the sugar, 1 1/2 cups heavy cream, buttermilk, cornstarch and salt to a large saucepan over medium heat. Whisk until the sugar dissolves. Bring the mixture to a boil, stirring occasionally, until it thickens slightly, about 5 minutes. Reduce the mixture to a simmer and cook for another 5 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Place the egg yolks in a bowl and lightly beat them. Steam 1/2 cup of the warm milk mixture into the egg yolks while stirring constantly. Pour the egg yolk mixture back into the saucepan with the milk and heat over medium heat, stirring constantly. Stir until it is combined and very think, about 2 to 3 minutes. Remove the mixture from the heat and pour it into a bowl. Stir in the chocolate, butter and vanilla until it is melted and combined. Place a piece of plastic wrap directly on top of the chocolate pudding and stick it in the fridge for 30 minutes.

Add the remaining cold heavy cream to the bowl of your electric mixer and beat on medium high speed until peaks form. Add in the powdered sugar and beat until combined. Remove pudding from the fridge and fold 1/2 cup of the whipped cream into the chocolate. Stick the remaining whipped cream in the fridge. Spread the chocolate evenly over the pie crust. Refrigerate the pie for at least 4 hours before serving. Right before serving, spread the whipped cream on top and cover with some chocolate shavings or sprinkles.

[adapted from emeril]

Chocolate Cream Slab Pie I howsweeteats.com

I just can’t.

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60 Responses to “Chocolate Cream Slab Pie.”

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    1
    Laura (Blogging Over Thyme) — December 20, 2013 @ 7:55 am

    Wow!! I’ve never seen a non-fruit slab pie. I still haven’t made one either, mostly because I’m in the same situation and worried I’d eat like 5 lbs of pie within a span of a few days. They sliced up so perfectly too!

    Love it.

    Reply

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    Jennifer @ Peanut Butter and Peppers — December 20, 2013 @ 7:56 am

    Oh Dear Heavens! I wish I was in your life because I would want this pie!! I know when you call something slab it’s kind of funny, but getting a slap of something that contains chocolate and whip cream, oh yah! I’ll take a fat slab, please!!! Awesome recipe and great for holiday entertaining!!

    Reply

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    Taylor @ FoodFaithFitness — December 20, 2013 @ 8:01 am

    I have never heard of a slab pie. But, I want it…need it in my life. We are only 2 people here as well so we would fall into the “pie forever” category if I made it. And, I am totally ok with that due to 1)chocolate 2)pie crust 3)whipped cream

    Reply

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    Angela @ Eat Spin Run Repeat — December 20, 2013 @ 8:34 am

    I’ve heard of slab cake, but not slab pie – they’re pretty much the same it seems.. like you said, just another word for a whole crapload of cake/pie! Today I’m celebrating my last day of work before the holidays, and these are definitely appropriate for celebrating!

    Reply

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    Belinda@themoonblushbaker — December 20, 2013 @ 9:32 am

    We can buy slab pies in Australia but most of them are very bland as hell, also the crust is terrible,
    I would think Xmas is the only time you CAN consume a pie with slab in it. Either way This totally looks delicious!

    Reply

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    Tieghan — December 20, 2013 @ 9:34 am

    I have been meaning to make chocolate cream pie since Thanksgiving, but I think I will just make this now. Pie bars are SO much easier than real pie! Looks so freaking good!

    Reply

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    Brittany from CountingMyCupcakes — December 20, 2013 @ 9:39 am

    Need!!! And pie brownies are definitely a thing. That reminds me of my mini red velvet brownie pies!! Please check them out and let me know what you think :)
    http://www.countingmycupcakes.com/2012/05/mini-red-velvet-brownie-pies.html

    Reply

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    Lily @ Life, Love, and Cupcakes — December 20, 2013 @ 9:39 am

    I didn’t know it was possible to get to a point where you’re unable to stomach another cookie! I hope I never get there…or maybe it would be for the best since I need to stop eating cookies! This looks heavenly..too bad there are only two of us at home and we’re already drowning in cookies!

    Reply

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    Camilla — December 20, 2013 @ 9:44 am

    This is exactly the recipe I was looking for! Something easy and different for Christmas. Thank you!

    Reply

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    Bev @ Bev Cooks — December 20, 2013 @ 9:51 am

    Oh, I just can.

    Reply

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    DessertForTwo — December 20, 2013 @ 10:04 am

    We always do chocolate cream pie for Christmas dessert. Well, my dad does a pumpkin pie too, but we all love chocolate cream. I need to slab-ify it!

    Reply

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    12
    Heather — December 20, 2013 @ 10:08 am

    SWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON

    Reply

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    Marsya — December 20, 2013 @ 10:16 am

    It’s 10 p.m. & you make me hungry . :)

    Reply

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    Averie @ Averie Cooks — December 20, 2013 @ 10:24 am

    I’ve wanted to make a couple slab pies lately but have talked myself out of them due to the size (seem to all make a boat load) but I would gladly have a boatload of this around! Omg it looks so good!

    It’s the density of the layers that I can just tell from that first pic. I can taste Mother Lovett’s buttery crust just seeing those pics and the richness from all the eggs and cream in the filling. Holy.moly. Pinned!

    Reply

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    lacy — December 20, 2013 @ 10:39 am

    tomorrow and sunday. k thanks. byeeee.

    Reply

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    Tracy | Peanut Butter And Onion — December 20, 2013 @ 10:40 am

    This is gonna be my Christmas dessert

    Reply

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    Gaby — December 20, 2013 @ 11:03 am

    So, for big family holiday events, my mom usually tells me to lay off and just bake cookies than we can bring with us on the road. I sent her this recipe this morning and was on the phone with her when she opened it up. Her reaction? “Ohhhh, this looks yummy! Oh, Gab, this looks so good.” No questions; we’re making it for our 25-person New Year’s party! Thanks for winning over my mom!

    Reply

    • Jessica — December 20th, 2013 @ 11:18 am

      ahhh love it!

      Reply

      • Gaby — January 2nd, 2014 @ 5:41 pm

        Update: i made it, dividing the recipe up into two pans, and it was fabulous! Not too sweet, but rich enough to impress the crowd. Will definitely make this again!

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    Katie — December 20, 2013 @ 11:09 am

    Do you think it matters whether you make this with milk, semi-sweet or dark chocolate? Would it work with any of them?

    Reply

    • Jessica — December 20th, 2013 @ 11:17 am

      yes, for sure! i think that whatever your preference is – go for that.

      Reply

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    Alexe @ Keys to the Cucina — December 20, 2013 @ 11:12 am

    I love this and even have a leftover pillsbury dough from last weekend. My name is all over this one!

    Reply

  20. #
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    Annie @ Annie's City Kitchen — December 20, 2013 @ 11:19 am

    Dyyyiinnnnngggg. This looks out of this world.

    Reply

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    Niki — December 20, 2013 @ 11:21 am

    I’m not normally one of those people who screams at their computer at 8:00am…but I just said out loud (at work) I AM SO MAKING THAT! So then I had to explain myself. Oh dear. But I”m totally making this to take for dessert to my in-laws. Along with a giant tray of of ‘dainties’ as we call them in the north (Canada) – squares and bars and cookies!
    You’re the best Jessica. Merry Christmas lady! May Santa bring you nothing but glitter and neon and Lisa Frank.
    Niki :)

    Reply

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    22
    Erin — December 20, 2013 @ 12:59 pm

    This looks AMAZING. This would be perfect for my family’s Christmas dinner, but we’re a fairly small group. Do you think the recipe could be halved?

    Reply

    • Jessica — December 21st, 2013 @ 12:04 pm

      if you have a smaller sheet pan, then yes! otherwise i would just follow the recipe i adapted it from and make a regular pie. :)

      Reply

  23. #
    23
    Layla @ Brunch Time Baker — December 20, 2013 @ 1:05 pm

    These bars/pies look so delicious and light!

    Reply

  24. #
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    Katrina @ Warm Vanilla Sugar — December 20, 2013 @ 1:54 pm

    You always have the dreamiest names for recipes. This one is fab.

    Reply

  25. #
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    Michelle @ A Healthy Mrs — December 20, 2013 @ 3:15 pm

    Yum, yum, YUM! My mouth is watering just looking at these photos!

    Reply

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    Caitlin @ teaspoon — December 20, 2013 @ 3:47 pm

    My fridge currently is developing a muffin top too. What a good saying. I wouldn’t mind some chocolate slab in my fridge to top it off though!

    Reply

  27. #
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    Katie — December 20, 2013 @ 4:28 pm

    holy beautiful pie.

    Reply

  28. #
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    Megan — December 20, 2013 @ 4:54 pm

    I’ve been sitting here staring at that top photo getting so hungry. All I have is an apple. And an apple is not chocolate pie. Damnit!

    AND yum! I want this.

    Reply

  29. #
    29
    Larry — December 20, 2013 @ 5:01 pm

    FCUK.

    Reply

  30. #
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    Ashley Bee @ Quarter Life Crisis Cuisine — December 20, 2013 @ 6:52 pm

    This looks incredible! Like portable chocolate cream pie. My fiancee’s favorite Christmas dessert is chocolate cream pie, I should make this for him!

    Reply

  31. #
    31
    Mariah and Coty@quirksandtwists — December 20, 2013 @ 8:57 pm

    I think I need this thing you call slab pie!

    Reply

  32. #
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    Erin Helgerson — December 20, 2013 @ 10:37 pm

    I will totally come over righthisverysecond and eat some slab pie with you. Amazing.

    Reply

  33. #
    33
    Rebecca LeFever — December 20, 2013 @ 11:16 pm

    If It looks like that then I don’t care what it’s called. Give it to me.

    Reply

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    34
    Heather of Kitchen Concoctions — December 20, 2013 @ 11:26 pm

    Wowzers! That’s a whole lotta drool worthy pie! : )

    Reply

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    Camilla — December 21, 2013 @ 11:18 am

    Sorry- is 1/3 Tablespoons correct? Isn’t that a tsp?

    Reply

    • Jessica — December 21st, 2013 @ 12:02 pm

      oops sorry! it’s 1/3 cup.

      Reply

      • Camilla — December 21st, 2013 @ 2:14 pm

        Great! Thanks!

  36. #
    36
    Barbara | Creative Culinary — December 21, 2013 @ 1:47 pm

    I just made a French Silk Pie with a friend the other day. It might as well be called ‘Take your life in y our hands before you eat this pie’ according to her because it has raw eggs in it. I need to try this method and see if I love the results as much. It sure looks divine.

    One note for you? If you like pecans or walnuts or even almonds, try putting some of them in your graham cracker crusts. I know you will have a word for that when you do…but know that ‘love’ is taken! :)

    Reply

  37. #
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    Mercedes@Satisfy My Sweet Tooth — December 21, 2013 @ 4:41 pm

    This looks so good and refreshing-not too rich!

    Reply

  38. #
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    Tracy | Pale Yellow — December 21, 2013 @ 6:06 pm

    Yum! Love the look of a slab pie, this looks fantastic!

    Reply

  39. #
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    Beth @ The Collegiate Baker — December 21, 2013 @ 11:12 pm

    This pie looks insanely good! I would definitely be okay with having all that pie in my fridge, with or without guests coming over. :)

    Reply

  40. #
    40
    Bianca @ Confessions of a Chocoholic — December 21, 2013 @ 11:47 pm

    I think “chocolate cream” more than neutralizes slab, so it’s all good! This looks ridiculously good.

    Reply

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    rmd — December 22, 2013 @ 1:02 pm

    I LOVE

    Reply

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    rmd — December 22, 2013 @ 1:07 pm

    Wait! Trigger finger! I LOVE slab pies! I always make apricot cherry or dutch apple…I think I like slab pie better than regular pie…something about the ratio of filling to crust….I’ve had friends tell me the apricot cherry slab pie is like a giant pop tart….love that! But chocolate cream????? It never occurred to me! It looks amazing and now you’ve opened the door to a million more ideas for slab pie! That’s AFTER I make this one….You never fail to inspire. Love you, love your blog, you make me laugh on the worst of days….have a wonderful holiday!

    Reply

  43. #
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    Tonya — December 30, 2013 @ 1:32 am

    Graham cracker crust can slice well too. After you assemble it, bake it for 10 minutes or so. This pie sounds yummy.

    Reply

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    natalie @ wee eats — December 30, 2013 @ 12:49 pm

    I wish I lived by you so I could partake in all of the pie deliciousness. This is my favorite kind of pie, and i’ve been SEVERELY SLACKING in making it… and now I just want to make it even more. But I’m in that “house of 2″ category so I guess I’ll have to bring some to work and pawn it off on my coworkers… or be prepare myself to eat 234 square inches of pie…

    Reply

  45. #
    45
    Leslie — January 4, 2014 @ 9:00 am

    Yes please! I am drooling over here! I found this recipe on Pinterest, where I am a new follower. . Thanks for sharing! I will definitely be making this.

    Reply

  46. #
    46
    Connie | URBAN BAKES — March 14, 2014 @ 1:49 am

    This looks incredible! I was hesitant when I first heard the name “slab” too but a recent cookbook I bought (in December) had it all over the place. So yea I guess you’re right, it’s the thing now. Beautiful photos and blog :-)

    Reply

  47. #
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    Nanda Prasanna — March 18, 2014 @ 5:35 am

    This one is amazing. I think this is the perfect dish for my son’s birthday party. Do you have any suggestions to make birthday memorable Jessica? I would be planning to invite 20-25 people on this occasion. Kindly please do let me know for some of the best ideas. Thanks.

    Reply

  48. #
    48
    Susie Mellen — August 30, 2014 @ 5:37 pm

    IS the chocolate unsweetened chocolate?

    Reply

  49. #
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    Deb Mallonee — August 31, 2014 @ 10:21 pm

    Help! What kind of chocolate? Bittersweet, semi-sweet, milk? There is already quite a bit of sugar, so I can’t it would be milk chocolate. Emeril’s recipe says semi-sweet, but he only uses 1 cup sugar. If anyone has made this and can let me know ASAP, I’d be most appreciative.

    Reply

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