1. Thursday night, after a week of indulging in nightly s’mores, wine, mojitos, tacos at midnight on Wednesday and enormous breakfasts, I went to dinner with one of my great friends and had this SPIKED chocolate covered pretzel milkshake. Clearly, I needed it.

2. I’m still in a boozy mood. Quite frankly, I’d like to get drunk. These popsicles and floats are not helping.

3. My favorite face baby started walking. Which is awesome, but I secretly and selfishly think it sucks because I can’t cuddle him to pieces without him squirming like a fish. Annnnd we are eating tacos together tonight. (Which I obviously need.) Annnnd I’m obsessed with these photo contests his uncle started. Heh.

4. The herbs. They are all pretty much dead. I even went as far to cancel out my organic soil and compost by covering them in Miracle Grow. THAT DIDN’T EVEN WORK. Plants hate me.

5. Oh. Maybe it’s because I tend to hate them? Ooops.

6. Real food: this banana coconut cake and these ice cream cookie dough brownies. Just stop it right now.

7. I can hardly contain my excitement (like to the point of possibly wetting myself) because this weekend we leave for Northern Michigan, aka my favorite place in the universe! Which means I will post an obnoxious amount of pictures on facebook and instagram, and will probably blog life-things daily. Total overkill. I’m also going to eat a TON of ice cream.

8. My husband is probably 23 characters in to a text message reading “did you really just say ‘wet yourself’ on your blog? That’s so unprofessional Jess.”

9. I scrubbed my kitchen floor on Sunday. Like, down-on-the-knees-with-a-sponge kind of scrubbing. No mop, no swiffer, no contraption to do it for me. And do you know what I decided? Scrubbing the kitchen floor makes me feel like I’m going to go into labor, even though I’m not pregnant. Like I actually FEEL like I’m going to birth a child. I’m chocking it up to my mom and grandma always telling someone who is past their due date to scrub the kitchen floor. It’s amazing what children pick up.

10. New obsession: the thought catalog blog. It’s like they are inside my freaking head. I keep trying to link one of my favorite posts but every one is my favorite. It’s like trying to choose my favorite movie or James Taylor song or pair of shoes or ice cream flavor.  So just go read them all and be like OMG… How are you in my brain?!

11. If you’re following me on pinterest, I apologize for the severe pinning binge you’ve witnessed since last Thursday. But you know how I am.

12. How much of an a-hole would it make me if I were to throw a gigantic 30th birthday party for… myself? I swear I’m not that kind of girl, but oh wait – apparently I am. Obviously no gifts allowed. Just partying. Be honest. How much?

13. This must be what heaven looks like. Let’s live there.