Today’s dish is really just a math lesson.

white pizza pull-apart bread I

How many squares must you cut into this loaf of bread in order to feed two people appropriately? Answer: not enough.

How many calories does this bread even have if you just stand over the oven and eat it while it’s piping hot and oh who the heck cares if you burned your hands to smithereens. Answer: none. no calories. They only count if you’re sitting down.

How many minutes does this bread last if you make it for a few people or maybe even just, uh, yourself? Answer: no minutes.

I swear there’s an actual snack under all that cheese. Maybe.

white pizza pull-apart bread I

It all started with this cheddar tailgaiting bread from a few years ago.

AND! This is another spinoff of that ridiculous white pizza dip I shared two summers ago – yes, the dip that four of us ate in a matter of minutes. The flavor combo is just SO good.

First comes fabulous bread – I say sourdough but do what you want.

Next comes parmesan garlic thyme butter. Yes. PARMESAN GARLIC THYME BUTTER. As in b-u-t-t-e-r. Butter.

I almost drank it.

Instead, I drizzled it every bread crevice I could find. So I could later eat it.

white pizza pull-apart bread I

Then comes sun dried tomatoes. I didn’t do regular cherry tomatoes because I was afraid their water content, even when roasted, would make the bread soggy. We can’t be having that. So sun dried it was… chopped into itty bitty pieces. Oh my.

Then comes the cheese. Oh the cheese. PILES of cheese. Stuck in the cracks, blanketing the top, bubbling down the sides. However much you think you need… double it. That’s my motto from now on.

white pizza pull-apart bread I

So you know what? I tried this bread two ways. I tried it this way – the easy way out. The trashy go-to-the-store-and-buy-a-loaf-of-bread-and-slice-it-and-have-the-audacity-to-call-it-a-recipe way.

BUT. I also tried it this way. Last week I made my own dough, just like with this cheesy pull apart bread. I rolled it, cut, stuffed the cheese and butter and goodness deep inside. Baked it. It just… wasn’t that great. Actually, it was a fail. You will see it come December. I was super disappointed. Too doughy. But then I was all… what if… ?

A big fat crunchy, already-made loaf will do the trick. It just works.

So yeah. THAT. ^^^^^^

white pizza pull-apart bread I

P.S. I will fight you to the death for that burnt bubbly cheese.

white pizza pull-apart bread I

White Pizza Pull Apart Bread

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  • Preheat oven for 425 degrees F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Slice a grid pattern into the loaf of bread, leaving about an inch uncut at the bottom of the loaf. I find it easiest to slice longways and then go back and slice the rest of the grid.
  • Loosely tent the bread with foil and place in the oven for 10 minutes.
  • Melt the butter in the microwave or a small saucepan. Immediately add the garlic cloves to the butter, stirring well. Add in the parmigiano reggiano and the thyme leaves, stirring once more. Gently pry apart the bread squares and drizzle the butter into the crevices of the bread. Once you’re finished with the butter, gently add the chopped sun dried tomatoes down into the crevices of the bread too. Mix all the grated cheeses together and again, gently pry apart the bread and stuff the cheese into the crevices and pile it on top.
  • Bake the bread for 15 to 20 minutes, uncovered, or until the cheese is golden and bubbly. Remove the bread and sprinkle some extra parmigiano reggiano on top. Add the fresh basil leaves. Serve immediately.

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white pizza pull-apart bread I

is this real life?