the second trimester I

Hi! From the looks of the above I should be taking nice long time cleaning up our bedroom at the moment but instead I’m writing a bunch of junk on the internet in the form of an annoyingly large block of text about what it’s like to be knocked up with horrible quality phone photos because I don’t have the energy to get into a forty minute fight with my husband on how to use the iphone camera. So I’m here! Run on sentences and all.

I realize that I haven’t written much of anything regarding pregnancy in the entire second trimester, and thankfully that’s because things have been totally normal. Well, and I’ve been swamped with work and life – which may contribute to things being normal. I’ve had approximately zero time to obsess which is fantastic for a headcase like myself. Like I don’t even know if I’ve been nesting. Would I know if I’m nesting? Maybe moving has prevented nesting or the nesting has been overshadowed by (sort of) unpacking and living in a new space and doing those things, which otherwise would be nesting?

I know. I make no sense. This is my life.

The pregnancy has gone by so so super fast. Besides those first few weeks when I was a ball of depression and felt like every day was a year long, it’s been FLYING. I’ve felt like my normal self for the most part, aside from a few moments where social interaction seems like the worst thing ever and I want to strangle anyone who speaks to me about anything. Apparently there is this thing called hormones?

But let’s see. Here are the highlights:

A few nights ago I looked at Eddie almost in tears and said… “I feel like we are never going to be able to go to the movies again at the drop of a hat.” He looked at me like I had ten heads and said “uhhhh, when do we ever go to the movies now? We go like maybe once a year.”

He is right. We never go. I’ve had mini freakouts over a few ridiculous things like that in relation to our lives changing. I look back and find it hilarious. All I can think of is Sweet Home Alabama and the scene YOU HAVE A BABY. IN A BAR.

Then I feel better.

We are still completely stumped on if they baby is a boy or a girl. I mean, not that we should know, but still. Remember back when I had all those boy dreams? I haven’t had any since and I’m sort of in girl-mode right now, thinking maybe it’s a girl. It feels ridiculous and so impersonal to call the baby “it” so sometimes I say “he” or “she” and then everyone around me is like OMG YOU SO KNOW WHAT YOU’RE HAVING AND YOU JUST SPILLED THE BEANS! YOU’RE LYING TO US.

No. We have no idea, we didn’t find out, we turned our heads during the sonogram. NO CLUE. Best surprise ever. If I’m lucky enough to have more kids I don’t think we will find out… like ever.

I will tell you that one day I walked into our room and Eddie looked at me and said “so I don’t want to sound like an asshole and obviously my first hope is for a healthy baby, but lately I’ve really been hoping we have a girl at some point.” I’m like WHAT. Who are you? For years he’s talked about how he would be scared to have a girl and not know what to do. It was super adorable. Then he’s also had moments like that about boys. I want both boys and girls and just have lost all notions on if this babe is a he or she. I cannot wait to find out. If I was ten years younger I’d want to have like six kids.

(Eddie probably needed the Heimlich after reading that.

Since we still don’t know, I haven’t bought one piece of clothing or anything. On Friday I did buy some nursery furniture (and a ridiculously comfortable glider/rocker/chair thing), and ummm… thank goodness I did since it won’t be here until the beginning/middle of November. Other than that, we’ve still been trying to get settled in the new house (which is a freaking joke because, uh, hello – we won’t be settled forever since I’ve been home for about ten minutes all month) and figure things out here. If I start to come unglued over that, Eddie looks and me and shouts WOMEN USED TO BIRTH BABIES IN CAVES.

I need to write that on my head in sharpie then look in the mirror.

I have done a teeny bit of research on things like strollers and whatnot, which has mostly ended up in major meltdowns because why do people in 2014 have like 13 different strollers for one child? I’M SO CONFUSED. Please feel free to leave your input on strollers below – which will probably make me even more overwhelmed but I’ll still love you. I really REALLY love the idea of the UPPAbaby stroller that my brother’s fiancé told me about. I’m still looking into it and yes I realize it’s like Beyonce-priced. Apparently I’m carrying a Blue Ivy in my belly. (p.s. sidebar: please tell me you watched the Jay-Z/Bey concert special on HBO last night? UGH SO GOOD.)

My appetite is still weird as heck. I’m rarely hungry for anything but I feel the hunger once it gets bad – there just isn’t much I want to eat. I still always have granola bars with me because they are the quickest and best option. I do a ton of fruit, lots of apples and berries and bananas. At 22.5 weeks I felt like a bottomless pit, but it only lasted for two days and has never returned. I can’t eat nearly the amount I used to. I’ve loving hummus and those big fat sourdough pretzels for a snack. I drink a ton of water and kombucha – and need a few sips of carbonation here and there. Mostly in the form of the passionfruit la croix.

Otherwise… food is weird.

While we were on vacation in August, I realized that it’s nearly impossible to lie on the beach while pregnant. I couldn’t really be on my back for very long and obviously couldn’t lie on my stomach. Does that mean I should throw my body on it’s side? That’s weird and makes it difficult to read. The only way beach life was comfortable was with a chair.

I feel the baby move alllll the time now. It’s so wonderful. The crazy thing for me was that I didn’t feel it move the first time until almost 22 weeks. I was dying. First of all, to be honest, I was pissed and nervous. Many of my friends felt their babies move by week 16 or 18. I was sad that I had to wait so long. I felt like I was missing out. I was also still at the point where I was afraid to be happy and think it was REAL, even though we’d had the anatomy scan. I thought feeling movement would help my fears. My doctor said that it was most likely because I have an anterior placenta so I couldn’t feel movement until the kicks were a little stronger? And I know I’m not super lean or anything, but even at my 20-week appointment she walked in and was all “so you probably feel the baby all the time now, huh?” with a huge smile on her face. I pretty much wanted to wail NOOOOOOO! Because I didn’t.

I do suspect that I could have felt a bit of movement before 22 weeks, but we were moving and I was packing up our entire house while still doing work for the blog and book stuff. I rarely had a second to sit down and focus, and once we moved in to the new house is when I finally felt the kicks for the first time.

While on vacation, we saw the kicks on the OUTSIDE of my stomach, which was so cool. They still aren’t pronounced or anything but we can definitely see the baby bouncing around.

Seriously, sometimes I’m like WTF is he/she doing in there? It’s like a crazy manic dance party. No idea where that would come from… cough cough.

(I have visions that there is a personal soundtrack in my stomach complete with 90s Mariah, Whitney and Backstreet Boys. Obviously.)

I’m still not tired. If you haven’t read my previous updates… I’ve never been tired. I’ve kind of been the opposite. Sometimes my body feels a bit lethargic, or just like I can’t do the things I once did, but I’m so very rarely tired that it’s annoying. I can get by on 5 or 6 hours of sleep easily and not need a nap. I’m always awake.

I should have prefaced this, however, by saying that I am also a lunatic, my mind is always going a million miles an hour, I’m a light sleeper and not big on sleep to begin with. Yeah I know. Let’s see what I have to say in December. HAHAHAHAHAH. Not.

My activity level hasn’t dwindled much, but in the last three weeks I haven’t done a lot of “formal” exercise. From the time of my last update, I was still working out, walking a bunch, doing yoga at home and moving a ton. It was tough to strike a balance while I was packing the house because I didn’t want to overdo it with 12 hour days of moving and running up and down steps, PLUS exercise. It was all fine though. The first day we were in Michigan, I worked out and then we did our usual we-walk-everywhere-all-day routine and that night I felt it. We probably walked eight or ten miles that day and I just ended up sort of… sore? I didn’t feel overexerted until after, which is frustrating because I never know what’s too much. Other than that I really just listen to my body as best I can. These last two weeks I didn’t pack any sort of workout clothing for book tour trips. I knew I’d be walking all over NYC and on my feet a lot and not getting a huge amount of sleep. That was definitely the best choice for those locations. And now I’m playing it by ear depending on my schedule for the day. Some walking and yoga is always a must.

With the traveling and being-on-my-feet thing (and still wearing heels… ) I was initially concerned with swelling. Thankfully I have not had any yet, but in order to help that issue, back in August I bought a pair of compression socks. I actually just bought the running ones (I got a pair of socks and sleeves) because Eddie has used them for years and I was familiar with them. Of course, I got neon pink ones. While traveling, I put them on after (fairly short) flights and at night for a few hours while I do some work in my room. At home I wear them during the day occasionally while cooking. I love ’em.

On Friday while my mom and I were shopping, it was the first time that people were commenting on me being pregnant. Nearly every store I went in to, people asked either her or me about it. I loved it! It only took until 28 weeks. Sheesh. And no, no one has touched my belly yet or even come close. I don’t know if it will bother me if they do. Even though I can be insane at times, I don’t get worked up over things like that.

When it comes to what I’ve been wearing, I’m going to do a separate post about that this week. Is that cool? Or dumb? Had I not had book events to do, I probably would have lived in the above outfit for my entire pregnancy. But since I actually had to be somewhat professional and go places and have my face seen in public, I found a lot of great outfits that worked and I took (horrifyingly embarrassing) photos of all of them so far on hotel mirrors. Like actual OUTFITS. Not just yoga pants. OMG. Some pics are like the craptastic quality mirror shot above but others are a little better.

AND I also want to tell you about the other clothing items that have been lifesavers, like my old lululemon crops and new athleta stuff, plus the places that I found completely worthless for maternity clothing. I’m looking at you, Target. Stay tuned.

That’s that. I may do these a little more frequently now… or I may not. It depends on if I have things to say. Or at least – things to say that I deem important (hello: everything. not really but kind of.). I’m going to at least talk about some more things I’m loving as the weeks go by. Thanks for making it through all 2000 words because we are sooooo exciiitttted! Eeeee.