Most days the thought of bearing my own offspring scares me to death.

I can barely tie my own shoes.

I lay on the couch most Saturday mornings until 11 am. Or later.

Sometimes I yawn in church. And chew gum.

Sorry, Dad.

I watch Sopranos marathons for four hours straight and then spend another two asking my husband if Tony is real because I know, I just know that he has to be real. He has to be.

I watch mindless trash like Jersey Shore too.

Not apologizing for that one Dad… I know you watch it too.

I don’t water my flowers.

I don’t clean the refrigerator.

Laundry is merely a blip on the radar.

And just yesterday, I went to spray a baking sheet with Pam and grabbed Raid instead. Raid, as in the poisonous ant killer. Raid, as in the life-ending serum that you drown insects in. Yes, I almost served Mr. How Sweet chicken tenders spritzed with Raid. How delicious!

 

Sometimes I have ice cream for dinner. And I nap. Oh boy… do I nap. Can I still nap with a kid? Like, really nap. Not a little 15-minute shut eye that makes you wish you’d simply stayed away and done something productive.

I stay in my pajamas some days until 8 o’clock at night. Hot, sexy sweatpants… XXXL sweatpants from college. Mr. How Sweet is lucky, right? Oh well, you can’t have it all…

But what I’m really worried about?

What I fret about all day? What keeps me up at night?

I might need to eat vegetables. Really people.

Honestly, do I have to? I don’t think I’ll ever love anything enough to eat a broccoli stalk.

And that whole balanced meal business? Snooze.

No more caramel and bacon for dinner I suppose.

Woe is me.

 

When that time comes, and I’m sure it will as I will rightfully deserve to have a smart-mouthed little brat screaming at me in the dressing room of Limited Too (memories!), I think I’m only going to make myself dinners like this.

Boil water. Dump in pasta. Saute onions. Add mushrooms. Add wine. [Lots of it.] Add cream.

Voila. Dinner is done in 15 minutes.

Creamy Mushroom Gnocchi

serves 2

1 pound whole wheat gnocchi

1 tablespoon olive oil

1/2 onion, chopped

1 garlic clove, minced

2 cups mushrooms, chopped

1/3 cup white wine

1/2 cup heavy (or light) cream

1/4 cup freshly shaved parmesan cheese + more for topping

fresh parsley for garnish

salt and pepper

Heat a skillet over medium heat and add olive oil. Add onions with a sprinkle of salt and pepper and saute until soft, about 5-6 minutes. While onions are cooking, prepare pasta and boil according to directions. Once onions are translucent, add garlic then add mushrooms. Cook until mushrooms are soft – about 5 more minutes.

Add wine and cook for 2-3 minutes. Stir in cream. Turn off heat and stir in parmesan. Add cooked gnocchi to cream sauce. Serve with chopped parsley and more parmesan.

Oops! I forgot a step: drink the wine. Lots of it.

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95 Responses to “Creamy Mushroom Gnocchi.”

  1. #
    51
    Kelly — April 9, 2011 @ 8:36 pm

    I have the same fears! I have enough trouble taking care of my husband and dogs. Bring on the wine!

    Reply

  2. #
    52
    Michelle — April 9, 2011 @ 8:59 pm

    Yum!!

    Reply

  3. #
    53
    Cheryl Stoy — April 9, 2011 @ 10:19 pm

    Do not worry…I had 7…one from my first marriage, two from my husband’s first marriage and then we had 4 more because we like to live dangerously. I only worried about “balanced” meals about twice a month. I always made fresh salad so I didn’t worry about the veggie thing though most all of them had a fave veggie.

    We napped when they did and we had a steadfast rule: We didn’t want to talk to or see anybody under the age of 12 after 9 pm…unless they were bleeding or couldn’t breathe or it was a holiday or their birthday. Preservation of sanity was our main goal.

    As they got older we changed up dinner now and then by doing things like having one night a week where everybody was in the kitchen cooking or we’d have a “backwards dinner” (start with dessert first ) or have “breakfast for dinner”.

    “Formal Dinner” was one Sunday a month and everybody had to “dress nice”. We’d serve a big meal in courses and table manners were strictly enforced. (This way when we had to take them out to eat in restaurants or at other events they knew how to act)

    We’d even do a “movie night”. My husband would “make up” movie tickets and we’d put a Disney classic (mouse ears were required attire for everyone attending including mom and dad) or a classic comedy or musical in the VCR. We’d sell popcorn, hotdogs and pizza and candy. They used the “credits” they earned from doing chores around the house to “buy” the tickets and food.

    They all turned out fine…not a serial killer among them and one is now a vegetarian.

    Reply

    • Anne — October 31st, 2011 @ 5:37 pm

      Cheryl, this cracks me up! Not a serial killer among them. Great idea with the movie tickets and credits too – how creative. Anyway I’ve just returned from the market with all the ingredients I’ll need to make the gnocchi – looks delicious! Fingers crossed!

      Reply

    • Angela — April 10th, 2013 @ 10:03 am

      LOVE your creativity Cheryl!!
      And the above fears…. check, check and check!! I am 37 and we have been married for 5 years… the baby thing has been put on the list of things we must do:/ I’M FREAKED OUT!! What if they break? What if I raise a total jerk, or a dork? What if they aren’t happy? What if I’m so lazy that I don’t know that I was supposed to look into the school they need to go to… or shots… or… idk… whatever the crap else they need!! I mean, how are you supposed to know all the stuff you need to do?? Is there a check list or timeline thingy somewhere?? What if I can only have one (I’m the only child and hated it)? I mean, I’m OLD!! What if they have no friends and turn into an unbalanced freak cuz there was no sibling to keep them balanced!?!? OMGosh!!! Soooo…. anywho, I’m on board with your worries…. in the meantime, be FREEEEEEEEEEEEE! ;)

      Reply

  4. #
    54
    Tracy — April 9, 2011 @ 11:04 pm

    Yummmm this sounds so delicious! I love any kind of gnocchi dish but I’ve never tried whole wheat before. The creamy mushrooms just put it over the top!

    Reply

  5. #
    55
    Heather (Heather's Dish) — April 9, 2011 @ 11:56 pm

    i’d say the last step is the most pertinent…extra wine please and thank you!

    Reply

  6. #
    56
    Maranda — April 10, 2011 @ 9:27 am

    And serve with a side of broccoli! LOL! I can’t stand veggies…but yes…I eat them for Little Butt. I’m supposed to set an example right?? Boo! Luckily, The Hubble loves veggies. But Little Butt knows I’m in her corner. I don’t like veggies but I eat them kid…so you will too.

    Reply

  7. #
    57
    Alexandra — April 10, 2011 @ 2:32 pm

    Is that Rombauer you are pouring? :)

    Reply

  8. #
    58
    Alexa @ SimpleEats — April 10, 2011 @ 8:06 pm

    Gnocchi is amazing. I always feel “healther” because I eat less of it than regular pasta. Although that’s probably because it weighs 384271 pounds.

    Reply

  9. #
    59
    Brooke — April 10, 2011 @ 9:30 pm

    We are like two peas in a pod. Only I don’t mind veggies. I long for pajama days that include back-to-back movies and 3 hours naps though.

    Reply

  10. #
    60
    Baking Serendipity — April 10, 2011 @ 11:28 pm

    Kids or not, easy dinners like this one are the best. Looks fantastic!

    Reply

  11. #
    61
    J3nn (Jenn's Menu and Lifestyle Blog) — April 11, 2011 @ 3:43 am

    I think all of your “vices” are perfectly fine! You may do some things that would make Dr. Phil give you the stink eye, but you also work hard, so it all balances out, and that’s what important. Setting a “perfect” example? Pfft. WTF is perfect?! My parents napped often (old fashioned Italian father that took a siesta after lunch). And I am fan-freakin-tastic! :D

    The gnocchi looks amazing. So simple, but looks fancy!

    Reply

  12. #
    62
    Cookbook Queen — April 11, 2011 @ 11:17 am

    As the mother of a child, I can assure you that kids LOVE dinners of caramel and bacon.

    Seriously…that’s what Flintstone vitamins are for.

    Bring coloring books and candy to church. And you can eat and color during service and because it’s with your child, it’s perfectly acceptable.

    I’m basically a professional at making poor parenting choices seem perfectly okay. Just ask my son ;)

    Your gnocchi looks great…gnocchi and mushrooms are two of my favorite things!!!

    Reply

  13. #
    63
    Katie@Cozydelicious — April 11, 2011 @ 12:01 pm

    I need to find whole wheat gnocchi! i have never seen it…. if I can;t find it, maybe I will be breave and make it!

    Reply

  14. #
    64
    Eleanor@eatinglikeahorse — April 12, 2011 @ 4:59 pm

    Caramel bacon sounds like a balanced meal to me; sweet and savoury ;-)
    And on your Pam/Raid almost-mix-up, I put a can of deodorant in my cupboard the other day, haven’t got a clue why, and nearly sprayed that all over my roasting pan…!

    Reply

  15. #
    65
    Amanda — April 12, 2011 @ 5:37 pm

    Jessica,

    You crack me up. I literally was laughing out loud reading this post. We may be the same person. I can’t wait to make this dish! Sounds wonderful!

    Thank you for your witty posts!

    -Amanda

    Reply

    • Jessica — April 12th, 2011 @ 5:39 pm

      Thank you so much Amanda!

      Reply

  16. #
    66
    Michele B — April 12, 2011 @ 11:40 pm

    I do all these things and I am a mother of three…I watched an all day marathon of the T.V. show Supernatural last Saturday in my P.J.’s eating a box of Cheez-its and Dominos pizza and I won’t apologize to anyone for my occassional sloth like attitude. When you have kids continue doing all these things it is the only way you keep your sanity (I would proably avoid spraying the raid though…just sayin :) )………..

    Reply

  17. #
    67
    Kathi — April 14, 2011 @ 8:44 pm

    OMG! I just fixed this for for hubby and he loved it. Wants to try it with a little Italian sausage next time. Going in my keeper book. You are starting to be the star of my keeper book. Keep them coming…..please!!!

    Reply

    • Jessica — April 14th, 2011 @ 10:05 pm

      So glad you liked it!

      Reply

  18. #
    68
    Alex P — April 20, 2011 @ 11:17 pm

    What brand of whole-wheat gnocchi do you usually buy?

    Reply

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